The Conversation: BGTY With A Side Of IDGAF
BGTY. My grandpa, Chuck, used to sign off every greeting card, note, phone call, and in person goodbye to me with those four letters. Chuck, the consummate gentleman, Maytag washing machine repairman turned successful entrepreneur, one of the hardest working men I’ve ever met, also had some inner yogi and was mindful even before it started trending. What does BGTY stand for? Be good to yourself.
Chuck is no longer around but I carry his memory, those letters, and that simple reminder with me daily. It’s not always easy, but I try to check in and remember to be good to myself in various capacities; how I talk to myself, how I take care of myself, how I treat myself, and how I view myself during the good times and the bad.
As a former collegiate and still somewhat competitive golfer, I used to struggle with being good to myself with my thoughts surrounding my golf performance. I played some of my worst golf in college because I put so much pressure on myself before, during, and after my rounds. I was constantly thinking about my final scores, associated them with my self-worth, my identity, and would lose sight of the process and just playing one shot at a time. Since I was so worried about my final score, it was hard for me to be good to myself in that space between my ears and there was a lot of negative self-talk if numbers started adding up too high during a round and especially after if the score posted next to my name was less than ideal!
IDGAF. Fast forward to post-college and I incorporated a little bit of this approach and these five letters into my golf and well, maybe some other areas of life. What does IDGAF mean? I don’t give a f*%k. When I would go out and play, I didn’t have any expectations for my golf scores anymore, I was just so happy to be outside on the golf course, out of the office, enjoying the connections with who I was playing with, soaking in the experience, and what do you know, better golf results just came.
So why am I telling you this? Here’s the deal. Whatever results you are striving for in your life; personally, professionally, physically, emotionally, on the yoga mat and off, I encourage you to remember to enjoy the moments, the process, the connections, the going there not just the getting there, and to be good to yourself as you get after them!
Secondly, our results do not define us, it’s easy to associate them with our identity, our self-worth, but they do not make us uniquely who we are. On paper, visible, results don’t necessarily tell the story just like there are no pictures on a golf scorecard (there are a lot of ways to make a 1 or a 10 on a golf hole)! I am not my golf score, you are not your test score, your weight, that title next to your name, or that handstand press as instaworthy as it may be. There is so much more to being you, but that’s a conversation for another day…@MichaelSchaefferYoga?!!
Lastly, we aren’t always going to get the results we are looking for, shocker, right? We are not always going to get 100% as much as I love that little red emoji 💯. What matters is that we still show up for ourselves when we have perceived less than perfect results and that we BGTY through the ups and downs even it means sometimes having to sprinkle in a little IDGAF along the way! You got this, one shot at a time (for my fellow golfers), one step at a time, one breath at a time, LFGO (LET’S F#%KING GO)!