Way Of Life
“The spiritual way of life is not a theory, we have to live it.”
One of the most impactful lines in my favorite book. Two years ago my life changed drastically - again. Everything and nothing was uprooted, blown open, cleared out and happening. Let me elaborate. Nothing tragic happened TO me at this point in my life. I didn’t lose the roof over my head, I didn’t lose a loved one suddenly or get earth shattering news. Nothing about my surroundings or circumstances moved. Every last bit of mental and emotional space within me had molded into two feelings - desperate and willing. Desperate to no longer destroy my body, mind and spirit the way I had been so used to doing every single day. Desperate to be rid of the constant overwhelming fear, worry and doubt that was running my life for me. Desperate to stop being such an asshole to myself and everyone around me. Willing to speak up and talk about it. Willing to follow the lead by those who had peace and serenity in their lives. Willing to get wildly uncomfortable and do things differently.
Fast forward two years later and it’s all become an extremely spiritual way of living and being. If the word spiritual turns you off or creates a reaction, here’s the definition: The quality of being concerned with the human spirit or soul as opposed to material or physical things. There’s an abundance of work that goes into this way of life for me. I’ll name just a few: a steady practice in meditation, acknowledging and addressing my mental and emotional capacities, being 100% honest with myself and others about those no matter what they sound like, doing things for other people for no reason but to do things for other people, turning my judgements into appreciation and saying thank you out loud whether people are around or not. If you think I sound like a saint or that I’m trying to, let me tell you I fuck this stuff up all the time. I get too busy, I run late, life starts to feel good and easy and I forget about those two feelings of desperation willingness. I slip away from what works in my life. I can go about 3 days without some sort of combination of what I need to do before my fear is overwhelming, my self talk is declining and my connection with others is overtaken by selfishness. I’m in love with this quote by Leonard Cohen - “There is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in.” So we practice. We practice being, together. We practice moving, together. We practice living, together. I do not like every single person I know or come across, but this way of life has shown me how to find a little love for everyone.
Thank you. Let’s move.
-Amanda
